Happy new week Beautiful people…
We all from time to time feel a bit unsure of ourselves and sometimes it causes us to lose out on some great opportunities. Sometimes we shy away from being confident because we associate it with being arrogant. But what exactly is confidence? According to the Advanced English Dictionary and Thesaurus, confidence is defined as “freedom from doubt or belief in yourself and your abilities.” While arrogance is defined as “overbearing pride which is evidenced by a superior manner”.
1. Be in the Know
Gone are the days were we had to sit down to read a newspaper every morning and watch the evening news bulletin to know what’s going on around us. We now live in an age of technology , where information is at our fingertips and just a click away. Sometimes we aren’t confident because we feel inadequate when we are in a crowd of people that are having a seemingly intelligent conversation. I am so guilty of feeling that way because I’ve never been one to take an interest in the news and as a result when people are talking about an oil crisis in Syria I look at them like they’re speaking a language I’ve never heard. Basically what I’m trying to say is being aware of what’s going on locally and on an international scale can seriously boost your confidence because you can add your two cents to conversations. Being in the know doesn’t only mean catching up with the news on your cellphone or tablet when you are on the go but also reading books that enrich your life. Reading motivational books can also help to boost your confidence . Below is a list of books that I’ve found worth giving a read:
- The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma
- The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho
- The Winner Stands Alone by Paulo Coelho
NB. If you live in Botswana these books are available at Exclusive Books but if you don’t feel free to get them on Amazon.
2. Dress the Part
I’m sure once or twice we’ve heard the saying, “Dress how you would like to be addressed.” The way we dress speaks volumes to people we meet for the first time even before we utter a word. Although we are all free to dress as we please we need to remember that all clothes have occasions. I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one whose been invited somewhere and perhaps there was no specified dress code on the invitation so you decided to keep it casual and you got there only to find everyone looking so formal and you just felt like making a run for it. And even after someone reassures you that you don’t look that bad and you shouldn’t worry about it, you just feel like sitting in a corner somewhere . Well that’s simply because how we feel on the inside and how confident we are to some extent is affected by how we look on the outside. Dressing the part will make us feel more confident when we are among other people. I don’t mean buying expensive clothes and makeup but just taking the time to make sure our clothes are clean and ironed. Dress confident to feel confident.
How you carry yourself affects both how you feel about yourself and how others view you. Poor and slouchy posture makes you look unsure of yourself and makes it difficult for people to approach you. Walking with your back straight and shoulders out even when you are nervous about something makes you look confident to onlookers. Sitting up straight instead of with your back hunched not only shows that you take yourself seriously but it’s also good for your back. Basically it’s all about how our body language communicates with others. Good posture conveys confidence.
Our friends play a major role in shaping the kind of people we become so don’t surround yourself with people who constantly put you down. Surround yourself with a lot of positive energy. If you have some friends that only encourage you to lie, be disrespectful , turn up every weekend and not make plans for the future, they are toxic and you need to ditch them. Friends should be people that bring out the best in you and compliment your good qualities. Good friends build your confidence while bad friends tear it down. If you want to be more confident then it’s about time you start pruning some of those toxic friendships.
5. Fake it till you Make it
Lastly if all else fails and you just can’t get comfortable enough in your own skin just yet, Fake it till you Make it. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying be fake and lie about who you are but simply make up for your lack of inward confidence through your outward appearance. Even when you not sure about something or you have a presentation and you are just trembling, prepare well and put up a good show. Basically continue acting confident until you get the hang of it and you are actually confident from the inside. Believe in yourself and what you can do and don’t let others put you down.
Well those are my 5 tips on how you can become more confident. Don’t worry my confidence levels are still work in progress too and I would love to hear from you in the comment section below on what has helped you to become more confident. Till next time
Chocolate & Confident